As someone whose mission in life is to find the perfect handbag (and who has a lot of 'well, they looked perfect at the time' around the house to prove it *g*), your post made me smile.

Same happened to me the other day (minus the man with the boltcutters, sadly). I don't want a bag with stupid little straps which ends up tucked under my armpit and making me feel like the Hunchback of Notre Dame's long-lost sister *bg*.