More glorious legal snark
Apr. 1st, 2013 06:05 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
neadodsTruncated transcript of Supreme Court argument: http://courtneymilan.tumblr.com/post/46374496823/truncated-transcript-from-todays-scotus-argument
COOPER: Traditional bedrock of society. Let me say the words traditional and bedrock a couple more times. It’s really all about the tradition. And the nostalgia. The tradition of marriage is one of rearing children together, you know. And we don’t want to disrupt society by making marriage about anything else, like love or affection between two adults.
SCALIA: Tell me, Counsel. Gay marriage: Bad for children, or the worst for children?
COOPER: We really don’t know. Gay marriage is so new. We have no evidence. It could be that gay marriage will cause aliens to descend on this planet and eat the flesh of all children under the age of sixteen. Or maybe not. We just don’t know. We have to think of the children.
KENNEDY: This is extremely persuasive to me.
KAGAN: So what you’re saying is that when there are no longer children to think of, no marriage?
COOPER: Precisely.
KAGAN: So a state could pass a law refusing to recognize a marriage between people who are both over 55?
COOPER: No, because they could procreate!
KAGAN: I have checked with my girl parts, and they assure me this is not possible.
COOPER: Traditional bedrock of society. Let me say the words traditional and bedrock a couple more times. It’s really all about the tradition. And the nostalgia. The tradition of marriage is one of rearing children together, you know. And we don’t want to disrupt society by making marriage about anything else, like love or affection between two adults.
SCALIA: Tell me, Counsel. Gay marriage: Bad for children, or the worst for children?
COOPER: We really don’t know. Gay marriage is so new. We have no evidence. It could be that gay marriage will cause aliens to descend on this planet and eat the flesh of all children under the age of sixteen. Or maybe not. We just don’t know. We have to think of the children.
KENNEDY: This is extremely persuasive to me.
KAGAN: So what you’re saying is that when there are no longer children to think of, no marriage?
COOPER: Precisely.
KAGAN: So a state could pass a law refusing to recognize a marriage between people who are both over 55?
COOPER: No, because they could procreate!
KAGAN: I have checked with my girl parts, and they assure me this is not possible.
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no subject
Date: 2013-04-01 11:07 am (UTC)Although Cooper's comments about aliens also cracked me up!
no subject
Date: 2013-04-02 12:46 am (UTC)