Oct. 7th, 2005

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The Bad News
Work
I am simply not tempermentally suited to high-stress, hard-deadline tasks, and I only fall apart faster when I am in a situation where I need to coordinate a lot of people higher up the food chain than I am in a very short period of time. The only two reasons I can do Shore Leave's Masq are that 1) I get to give the orders, so if I'm blamed, it actually *is* my fault and 2) if the masq doesn't make deadline (ie, starts late), then there are no major lasting repercussions. Besides, I understand masqs inside and out after all these years in what I still call costuming (when did it become "cosplay"?) whereas I have only been in this division for nine weeks and am still doing a lot of things for the first time.

Now the brutal truth is, this is SOP in the department I'm in and any other equivalent department in any other company; it's the nature of the beast. They don't have any work in my usual area of expertise. Which means I have to either toughen up or job hunt, and either option depresses the hell out of me at the moment.

Although, I must say, I work with some great people. I think a fair amount of my stress is coming from a previous boss who used me as a whipping girl no matter what went wrong or why, to the point that I broke down. They do NOT do that here - but I keep expecting it all the same, y'know?

And just as an aside, I loathe MS Word with the fire of a thousand suns. There is just no reason for the same document to look differently when opened on two different computers.

Two Hearts
Two Hearts is the title of a novella that Peter Beagle has written, billed as the long-awaited sequel to The Last Unicorn. A while back, there was a big deal at the press that handles him saying that you could get an extra-special spiffy copy with sparkles and an autograph ABSOLUTELY FREE if you paid three figures for an audiobook. For those who are more fiscally responsible weren't rich, the novella would come out in October's Fantasy & SF mag.

I got a note from the publisher a while back saying that they were having problems with their suppliers. I nodded and forgot all about it. Except now it's October, and no sparkly novella *and* no copy of F&SF to be found.

While in the bookstore, I realized that being depressed, hungry, headachey, & close to my birthday was the wrong time to indulge in shopping therapy to make myself feel better and restrained myself... almost. I did pick up the pink Betty Crocker cookbook, the limited ed. with all the breast cancer info.

The Good
Academia
While driving from city to city to messenger stuff, I got to listen to a lot more of the Victorian Britain class. The prof says "uh" rather a lot (he was particularly bad in Lecture 2), but I'm still enjoying it tremendously and looking forward to "taking" more of his classes.

Fandom
My copy of the Lagaan soundtrack came a few days ago, and I've been self-medicating with the hypnotic strains of Ghanan Ghanan, Mitwa, Chale Chalo, and particularly the peaceful O Paalanhaare. Better yet, my copies of the other Fables graphic novels came last night, and I set them aside to be the cherry on top of what I figured would be a stressful day. Picked through them enough to realize that I'm only going to sink deeper into this fandom.

And it's a three-day weekend. I should have gone to the SiC meeting, but I'm not, and I'm probably not going to do fair in the rain. I'll stay home and get stuff done.

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