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Once Upon A Time Ain't Now
Jul. 18th, 2012 09:03 pmSo, there's this show called Beauty and the Beast coming soon, and it's supposed to be a reboot of one of the greatest fannish loves of my life.
Only it bears the same resemblance to Koslow's BatB as... well, as Elementary bears to Holmesian canon. The *names* are the same, and the new BatB is up one on Elementary because it's set in the same city.
But other than that?
There is no mythical man-lion. There's a hottie with a moderately bad dueling scar that he apparently considers "disfiguring" instead of "babe magnet." I have seen bigger birthmarks. (Seriously, I grew up with a girl with a port wine stain that covered the entire left side of her face, hairline to jawline, from ear to across the nose. She did not feel it necessary to live homeless in the darkness to hide the horror, I'm just sayin'.)
There's no Below. No city-beneath-the-city, no semi-democratic tribe of people nurturing each other's skills and talents. This ain't no fairytale, people!Not with fairytale shows on so many other channels, I guess. There is no special sanctuary, just nature, baby, red in tooth - maybe, there's been some work done in pretty boy's mouth and... cla - no wait, no claws... um, red in bridgework and fisticuffs.
And what really puts a burr under my saddle, apparently no awakening for Catherine. A show-and-character defining moment was when Catherine Chandler woke up and realized her own privilege and decided to define herself as "defender of the helpless" instead of "wealthy socialite." She got her beauty back, but not her blinders.
This Catherine apparently is Yet Another Person With a Gun Looking for Revenge And Calling It Justice. (This makes a crap acronym; if someone else wants to come up with better wording for the concept, please do.) Bad guys killed her Momma! Bad guys gonna eat lead! I presume that her awakening is going to be limited to "thank God I don't have a scar on my face" - if that. (Things like this always remind me of the cop who spoke at Malice one year. "We don't *want* the people who have a Mission For Vengeance to be cops. We root 'em out real fast.")
Frankly, the only reason I'm using the facepalm icon to discuss this travesty is because I don't have a headdesk one. New BatB may have one up on Elementary in location, but to be honest? At least Elementary is keeping the key qualities of actual characterization. (I hope. Oh lordy, do I hope.)
Only it bears the same resemblance to Koslow's BatB as... well, as Elementary bears to Holmesian canon. The *names* are the same, and the new BatB is up one on Elementary because it's set in the same city.
But other than that?
There is no mythical man-lion. There's a hottie with a moderately bad dueling scar that he apparently considers "disfiguring" instead of "babe magnet." I have seen bigger birthmarks. (Seriously, I grew up with a girl with a port wine stain that covered the entire left side of her face, hairline to jawline, from ear to across the nose. She did not feel it necessary to live homeless in the darkness to hide the horror, I'm just sayin'.)
There's no Below. No city-beneath-the-city, no semi-democratic tribe of people nurturing each other's skills and talents. This ain't no fairytale, people!
And what really puts a burr under my saddle, apparently no awakening for Catherine. A show-and-character defining moment was when Catherine Chandler woke up and realized her own privilege and decided to define herself as "defender of the helpless" instead of "wealthy socialite." She got her beauty back, but not her blinders.
This Catherine apparently is Yet Another Person With a Gun Looking for Revenge And Calling It Justice. (This makes a crap acronym; if someone else wants to come up with better wording for the concept, please do.) Bad guys killed her Momma! Bad guys gonna eat lead! I presume that her awakening is going to be limited to "thank God I don't have a scar on my face" - if that. (Things like this always remind me of the cop who spoke at Malice one year. "We don't *want* the people who have a Mission For Vengeance to be cops. We root 'em out real fast.")
Frankly, the only reason I'm using the facepalm icon to discuss this travesty is because I don't have a headdesk one. New BatB may have one up on Elementary in location, but to be honest? At least Elementary is keeping the key qualities of actual characterization. (I hope. Oh lordy, do I hope.)
