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A teeny-tiny fic about size

"Mine's longer than yours, Doctor."

"You wish."

"And bigger. You're skinny."

The Doctor sniffed. "You're such a size queen, Jack. It's not how big it is, it's how you use it."

"Let's face it, mine's just generally better."

"Mine gets the job done and looks smashing to boot."

"WILL YOU TWO STOP BRAGGING ABOUT YOUR COATS?" Martha screamed.

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